I prefer End-of-Life Doula over Death Doula.

At first glance the two are similar. Both roles work closely with someone who is facing the end.

Death.

The last door.

When given the choice, I think most would prefer to work with an end-of-life doula exclusively because Americans as a whole are averse to death. Not because a death doula isn't exactly what we are. But because the term is scary.

In the last century death has become something to avoid, to manage, to let "the professionals" handle.

I know that when any of my grandparents or elder relatives passed, no one even thought to handle the cleaning and preparation of the body themselves.

That's why we have funeral homes, right?

Embalming and a casket for everyone. Done and done. But there is SO much more available.

So much space for closeness, for love, for learning and revelation.

Where I live, in the South, word choice can make or break the situation.

And honestly, I get that.

But additionally, someone who takes on the role, the calling, the profession, of a death/end-of-life doula typically does much more than assist in the final hours.

We guide and educate clients and their loved ones about options, how to prepare one's life for one's end, assist with closure and legacy, and so much more.

So much more.

A doula in this field assists in the laboring out of this world, and surprising to many, that can begin years before death is peering through the windows.

There is no such thing as too soon to get one's affairs in order, because any day could be the day. We know this. Kind of.

We are here for that assistance and guidance as well, to field questions and advocate for the client's wishes in the face of potential backlash.

So, I prefer end-of-life doula. I prefer to enter the life of the client at any time that feels right, and help them plan for the inevitable that is end of life.

To help them sort out the details, and to know they've done their best to leave nothing to chance... other than the day, time, and the how. They have left no one to wonder if they did what the client wanted.

And that is a gift.